Awestruck

Shiv has started going to office early and by that time Ganesh and I also would have finished the morning rituals and would be ready to step out. We go to a nearby ground where Shiv drops us on his way. Ganesh would claim that he wants to go to ground, but by the time we need to get out, he will start saying "Appa, come. Come to gound with me. Office na na." But we have to get out and wave bye, after which the boy will keep on asking that we should go to appa's office. I tried to explain him that appa and amma must go to office to work and that is how we make money. We need money to buy food, water, tickets to Wonderla, cubbon park, train, biscuits, chocolates, bun, joos... EVERYTHING.

Me: Do you want them or not?

Ganesh: Venda (Don't want)

Me: Do you want cubbon park on Saturday Sunday or not?

Ganesh: Venda

Me: "It will be boring"

Ganesh: Boye venam (wants bore)

:(

Drawing Spirits

There was this "Drawing Competition" organized for the entire neighborhood children marking the end of Karnataka Rajyotsava celebrations. The communication to us was somehow missed but as Ganesh and I are mostly out in the neighborhood during mornings and we saw the event happening from the terrace. We came home immediately got ready and went there, but we were among the last ones to reach. Most of the children had left by then, but a few children who were there happily shared their crayons and waited for Ganesh to finish his random lines with white crayons on white paper! I tried to change the color of the crayon but he changed it back to white! One of the kids helped him making flower and such, and this activity kept him engaged for five minutes. This according to me was not even qualifying for a "competition" but it was happily submitted as an entry and it was pasted in the venue among the other entries of 2-5 years category.

There was the felicitation ceremony with some cultural programs in the evening, in which all the children had to participate. The first category being 2-5 years, then 6-10 years and 11-15 years. All the children were being called by names. Ganesh also promptly ran to the stage, seeing the proceedings. He went to collect the gift before his name was called and held himself back when the child whose turn it was, collected hers, backing himself off when his name was called. I had to ask him to go and collect. The radiant happiness in his face while collecting and shaking hands with the gentlemen on stage would have glown one dark room! As the lady who was announcing correctly said, "Judging the paintings was just a formality. It was the participation which was important. Please give a loud round of applause to all the children. We are so lucky to have them."

What I love about being with you

The way you express your love. Pinching both my cheeks, coming close and kissing.

"Amma mele taachi" Want to lay down on top of me, when unable to go back to sleep in the middle of the night. The feel of your eyelashes on my neck during that time.

Calling amma for every excitement of yours. Be it spotting the "Big Dish" (DTH Service dishes on rooftops) or a "paaida" (spider) or "Sooo many pijins" or "ejjauth fan" (Exhaust fan) for the zillionth time.

Calling amma for the minutest of distress. Falling down, being hit or anybody scolding or for that matter amma scolding you.

Calling me "Meenu". You know that I will not stop you from calling me by name. You will look at your father after calling me that with a smile, for his disapproval.

Not allowing anybody to even look at you, when I am present. Reporting every instance of somebody looking at you, talking to you or trying to carry you, be it your grandparents,  father or anybody. Ensuring that only I lift you when I am around.

You start walking when I tell that my arm is aching carrying you. I will carry you as much as I can, coz you will grow way too soon than I am ready for. You stop crying when I say I will also cry. Well, I know thats mean, but nothing really works sometimes.

Your dramas, tantrums, crocodile tears, running to sofa to lay down and cry. You throwing more fits on my suggestion of crying on the bed like heroines.

Your jumps and hops. You coming running to me in the evening on my return to home from work.

You demanding rather ordering what you want. Amma "dosa na na", "idli na na", "chappati na na", "upma na na", "pongal na na", "mammam na na", "adai na na", "Ing na na"... "maggi venam", "chocolate venam", "joos venam"

You using words tactically and innocently for your benefit. Making everybody laugh and laughing yourself.

I love you being a thoughtful and mature person. You know when to joke and limit it to fun only. Thats your character of maintaining respect and love with everybody. You remembering and revising everybody's name (huge extended family and lot of our friends and their children). Ensuring to call them like that when we meet. No wonder everybody is so fond of you.

Wink and babydom is gone

You are now 25 months old, feels like only last moment gone that you were given onto my hand, when you came out of me. How can I forget the tender voice of you crying, the wetness and the creamy layer on you then. (the tantrums and puppy shrieks of yours  remind me of that even more). A tiny human being who apparently thought that he is a part of the mother and now so clear about his own self.



Time flew by as I saw you achieving all your milestones either on time or way ahead of it, attempting for the next almost immediately of achieving one. Smiling at 40 days, turning over at 80 days, rolling then onwards, crawling on your back and not on tummy at 4 months :) (yes, only you can do such things), sitting down at 5 and half months, crawling on knees at 7 months, holding and standing at 9 months, walking without help at 10 months. And now full-fledged talking with correct grammar at 25 months. Oh! jumping and hopping. Even correcting us when we say something wrong.

    

The depiction of "Mary had a little lamb" rhyme in this particular video has a real girl and a sheep (which looks like a cow) with a drawn up backdrop of some landscape. 

You: Cow

Shiv: Na Ganesh, that's a lamb, baby sheep. It says Ba-Ae-Ae-Ae

You: Na Na. No Ba-Ae-Ae. It says Moooooooooooo.

Shiv: Na na. It is a lamb. Mary had a little lamb.

You: Appa na na. That's a cow. Moooooo Mooooo

Shiv: na na. Thats a lamb

You: COW

Shiv: :|

I love it when you hold yourself on me to the closest level possible and ask "amma baa", for me to set you in a way that the minute space left out is also gone, our rolling and tickling games. I am so proud of you being imaginative and happy to clean the mess you make by making Dosas on the floor with the banana shake or curds which is supposed to go to your tummy.

Me: Ganesh, what is your name?

You: Ganesh

Me (blown up with pride): How are you?

You: Ganesh

Me: How do you do? 

You: Ganesh

Me: :|

You preferring girls over boys (yes!) and not only giving them well-deserved special attention but also your snacks! I am always on cloud nine seeing your gentleman-ish approach towards them. What handshake(s), saying Hi with a wave and asking them to join you to play! 



You have been an entertainer throughout, which I knew from the moment you made the funny squeaking sounds while latching on to have milk on your day-one itself. Later on our storytelling, complaining and pulling each others legs, all in the pretext of talking to you. Oh! you have been a patient listener. Your fake smiles for posing for camera.



I must say, all the older girls in the family are really impressed with you already and are waiting for you to grow up to have more fun conversations with you. :)

Now that you will be a school boy in a few months' time, I just cannot comprehend the lightning speed reality.

 

What's ahead

Advances in self-care skills come fast and furious during the preschool years. Most kids have mastered the basics of self-care - dressing, washing their hands, feeding themselves, and going to the bathroom (but not necessarily wiping!) - by their fourth birthday. As the months and years roll by, your child will get better and better at meeting her own needs. You'll blink, a few years will go by, and she'll be able to tie her shoes and shower or bathe by herself. Then it's just a matter of time until she can do laundry and cook dinner, not to mention drive herself to soccer practice. By then you'll be wishing she'd let you baby her once in a while, but her refusal to give up her autonomy will be a testament to your success in teaching her to care for herself.

~ courtesy babycenter



PS: Ganesh's seat in one of the oldest schools have been confirmed and I am proud to announce that we are lucky to have our "self-written" application being considered for our "interview" for his admission.



Tagged... finally

Huurraaay... I have been tagged. :)

I have been thinking of tagging myself of late, but then the feel of somebody tagging me is amazing. Thanks sis for this.

The rules are simple:

1.Tag seven people

2.Link their pages in your tag post

3.Leave a comment in their comments section telling them they’ve been tagged

4.In your post, mention the person who tagged you and link her page

5.Write 7 things about yourself.

My first post was a detailed introduction about myself, and yes, coming up with a whole new list is definitely not easy, but then, as they say, who doesn't love to talk about themselves? Also, I cannot avoid being repetitive as a couple of things really so part of me to avoid. Here it goes:

I. If growing up is what is being considered as per age, I would say I felt like a free spirited teenager myself until a couple of years back. I am growing up now after child birth. Having said that, I am not sure, if motherhood is the cause of this feeling or its just a co-incidence.

II. Foodie - This describes me. As long as its vegetarian (Indian definition), I am in. I would rather go hungry than eating aweful food.

III. I love to go for a walk with my child. Even when its raining we take an umbrella and out-we-go. This is how my day has to begin, working day or not. We enjoy the freshness in air, flowers, dew drops and just a walk together. We come back all cheerful and have a hearty breakfast together. Makes my day.

IV. I would love to meet another confused soul who can match my levels of confusion. I need to think so much for days or months together to arrive at a conclusion, but then once decided, there is no looking back or repenting if things don't work as expected.

V. Love is what keeps me going, balanced and sane. It gives me hope and purpose to my life.

VI. Creativity makes complex things simple. I love watching movies, might own a canvas of artistic photograph or painting in near future. I want to make atleast one presentable BIG mural or glass painting or both in the course of my life.

VII. Singing - I know I am besuri at it but still I want to re-learn Hindustani Classical formally. (Love thy neighbour(s)... evil grins)

I would love to see what seasoned bloggers like Arunima, Sayesha, Parul, Rohini, Chris, Emaan and Ramya have to say about themselves.

Of Evil Eyes and such

People say that it exists, I do not believe in it. What I do believe is in the presence of divine, which is core of the very existence. To me, one form of that divine is love. And if somebody appreciates something, how can that be harmful? If that is the case, any child would be affected by mother's eyes all the time. And if somebody is jealous by nature, how can that jealousy be harmful to the subject? Its sad for the person as such for the feeling he or she unable to grow out of.

Ganesh's right hand was on the door pane, while he was switching on and off the kitchen light, when the door banged full-on on his middle and ring finger due to heavy wind, chopping off the top portions. My father-in-law was sitting right next to him. He was rushed to hospital and they did a surgery next day morning, taking skin from his bum and grafting it on the fingers. As nature has designed us to move-on, he did, immediately. He started playing the evening it happened and played the next day after he got up from the anaesthesia effect. It is unimaginable to even describe. Bruises, wounds, cuts, head bumps, all adorn the body of a child, but this is way too much for a 22 month old.

After a re-dressing (with anasthesia) this week, his dressing was removed completely today. My heart cries every moment. Everybody around seems to have come to terms with it, I am yet to. Not sure, if I ever will.

He was on a sling for a week, cooperating with us while putting it and tying up the string to it so that his arm is lifted up while he sleeps. He is kind of a child who would play in water all the time. He did not go near it even if he had the chance, because he was told not to.

Friends, bless him for his wellness, for I believe, good wishes and love last forever.

Happy Birthday My Darling Sister

I now very well know what I would have missed if you were not there in my life. I was longing for a small sister all my life and had even come to terms that I am not lucky enough to have that privilege, but then I had a dancing moment the moment I saw you, after spending thirteen years of my life alone, not having anybody to share the kind of bond that I have with you. You are not just my sister, but my daughter-cum-friend also, who gives hope to me and makes me smile at the very thought of her. My confidante, strength (weakness too). I wanted to flaunt you from the moment you came in my hands. My goodness, you were SO little. Forty days early, 1.8 Kgs, fragile and pink. Your earlobes were thin like onion peel and head circumference of a small doll. As a few days old baby, you would still have your waking up hours, stretching those tiny little arms and legs, looking inquisitively all around. Each of your milestones were celebrated with pictures and sweets. In that December-January Chandigarh near-zero-cold, you have crawled so much, running behind and away from us. Each day was a laughing riot at our home and neighborhood homes too. One of the best were your talking pre-school and early school years. Our cooked up genie stories. At 3, I must say, I was spell-bound by your imaginations and creativity.

 

You: Anna didi (Anjana, a neighbor), meri didi hai kya yaha?

Anjana: Nahi to

You: THHHAAAAAANNNNK GAAWWWDDDD! Mujhe do rupaye de do!

Anjana: Kyu?

You: Toffee

And as any other younger child in family, the different adoptive stories were told. And you were so innocent to accept each of the different versions also. As correctly said, what goes around comes around.

Sometime in early 2008.

You (on phone): Meenu, what's your blood group?

Me: B+

You: Mera pata hai kya hai?

Me: B+ hi hoga

You: O+. Papa ka bhi yehi hai.

Me: WOW. Sahi hai tu to universal donor hai. But tere ko dekh ke log bolenge, TU rehne de.

You: hmm. Tujhe pata hai mummy ka kya hai?

Me: B+

You: Nahi ji. A+. Mummmyyyyy, Meenu ko kaha se uthha ke laaye?

With each bullying, leg pulling, making each other jealous our bond has matured from good to better :). Your growing up years have been the best of my life as well. A tiny honey bunch that you are, a sport for all silly things we do and talk, small little gestures of belonging, sharing all possible feelings, laughing on anything and everything, cat fights , tantrums, property disputes including the aangan for kolams, amma-appa attention grabbing and their funny expressions and situations, fights for the sofa for best TV viewing and remote, I have fondly enjoyed all of them and deeply cherish them.

It is hard to believe that a baby who was not even the size of our arms has grown from a tantrum throwing sweetest toddler, cute child into a graceful, beautiful teenager now, who is confident, creative, fashionista, knows what she wants out of life, ambitious yet so mature and growing up to be a grounded young woman. I am so proud of you my dear. May your hard work leads to success that you deserve and I wish for contentment and peace in your heart. I love you.

Parenting: My approach

 I asked a psycologist friend of mine, if there are any books on parenting which provide effective tips on positive parenting. She said, "If there was any such formula, wouldn't we be all in Utopia?" "Wonderful point of view", I said. She continued, "Each family is different, individual approaches are different and, there is nothing right or wrong in this topic. Loads of love, not just sealed in heart, it should be expressed liberally throughout their lives. It works with everybody you know. Isn't it? My personal tip for you is to list down the things that you would want out of your child when he grows up. Ensure that the list does NOT contain his professional aspirations which are very personal to him. And start leading that life yourself, he will learn all of it by following your example."

 "Start leading that life yourself" I realize is so important. Its so easy, because all of it comes naturally out of love, yet involves so much of thoughts and you end up in reacting the right way most of the times, in the times of stress or crisis. In case you don't, which too is inevitable, "there is always a next time" thought which helps you deal with the guilt in a better way.

 My list is not only expanding in intricacies of my own approach towards life, but also making me stop, think and enjoy each moment of it. Each stage is awesome and we tap on the most receptive moment of Ganesh and whatever he has learnt till now has been completely fun-filled and ofcourse, self-learning (sometimes the hard way, eg. you will slip and fall if you run on watery floor. Its so amusing to see him walking on the dry patches on wet floor of the veranda after rains). 

I very strongly believe that life teaches and we as parents or teachers are just facilitators. As Kahlil Gibran says,

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children

as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

I wish Ganesh gets what I wish to have for myself too. Here goes the list:

• 1.    There is no hurry, things come and go at their own pace, just live the moment. Equally, its important to start doing things early and not in the nth moment to avoid being late. Despite of that if you are, it is OK, certain things are not in our hands.
• 2.    Aspirations and ambitions are for YOURSELF and not to prove or show off to the world. Challenge and compete with yourself, following others' examples is also extremely important. Having said that, life is not just about yourself or your family. You must have your social responsibilities clear. Be compassionate and empathatic. Only that gives immense satisfaction and hope for your life ahead.
• 3.    Sports, puzzles, quizzes are extremely creative. They are a MUST.
• 4.    Reading. The more words and strings of words you come across, you not only get ideas to express yourself much better but also get to see different perspectives which leads to have a better outlook towards life. And that my son, will pave path for you to be a better human being.
• 5.    I want you to be a traveller and not a tourist. Feel and live in that place however short the trip is; unlike a tourist, enjoy local food, feel the difference of aroma in air and taste of water, be a part of the place and that includes paying tax for the country wherever you live. Remember, the way of lives may be different, and languages may be different, at the end of it, everybody goes through the same set of emotions. Appreciate all of it.
• 6.    Express your gratitude to the Supreme for what you have. Build a relationship with Him, formal or informal.
• 7.    Enjoy what nature has it for you. The resources are for your use and not misuse. Always take time to feel and enjoy the breeze, rains and fragrance of the flowers. And remember, heat and cold bring in their own kind of beauty to surroundings. Do your part to conserve the precious ecosystem.

I have a boy

I am definitely not person who would stereotype gender. I make my 19 month old wear anklets, pink shirts, bangles, kajal, bindi and sometimes girly dresses. That my friends, is not going out of the way to prove that. That's because he is such a pretty boy and its irresistible to hold on to that temptation. But given the fact that I have a boy and almost (at least I feel) parented my sister too at this age, I feel there are some differences that make them what they are.

Yes, I am talking about women. Nature has it that boys will be boys from the earliest in their lives. I have proofs to support this statement.

Till today, he has been smitten by three women, in a span of one month. Not sure about the previous ones though because he never displayed such visible temperaments, may be because he was too small to express then. He is kind of child who will say "tata bubye" for "leave me alone" and even threatens to bite if the limits are crossed beyond his tolerance levels. Will not go to anybody and everybody who try to befriend him, even to a few people he has been seeing from the time he is born. He is comfortable in new places in our presence as long as he is not touched, carried or very strongly tried to be befriended.

There has been a sudden change in his pattern of behavior with the said women. From the moment he was introduced to them, he started addressing them immediately. If they give a little gesture of asking him to carry, he acknowledges immediately with a smile and allows to be taken. And display of his knowledge is carried out. Like today morning, a lady was out plucking flowers, he saw her and passed on a smile. She did not see him doing that, so he went near her and smiled once again. The lady acknowledged. He got encouraged and they had a customary introduction.

Ganesh: "Auntie, mango thee, chakkkai (pointing to mango tree and jackfruits). He started walking towards those trees and expected her to follow, but then she was in a hurry. She said bye, which he wasnt ready to say so soon. He continued to show pointing to a cat, "auntie.. poochai.. meow" and his current favorite flower, "auntie.. puple aappoo". "auntie.. bag"."auntie..paisha".She had to rush to office, so I had to carry him and start off, making him wave a bye.

A couple of weeks back, this very pretty college-going girl to whom he was smitten. After the introduction, he was like "oee akka (rohini akka)", and was surrounding her for the rest of two days (during a cousin's wedding), displaying his talents, showing her the trees and flowers with names he knows, making different animal and bird sounds, even refusing to come to me when the girl was visibly tired carrying him for around 20 minutes, putting her parents to wonder, as to why he is SO MUCH attracted to her. Hormones, I say.

All in all, I am happy that the ladies whom he has approached have taken time to genuinely acknowledge to his gestures. May this continue to happen all through his life. :D