Ganesh,

Dear baby - You brought back the lost something undescribable in me. The charm of life, looking forward for a new day; every single day, the lost all-time cheerfulness be it non-sense PJs, jumping or running like a mad on middle of a road with full public view to see you laugh without giving a damn to others, in a way my own childhood. I am actually attempting to make world a better place, doing small things to see a smile in faces, shunning things at my level to pollute less. I found a meaning for the life I have. All because of you little being.

I am sorry to bring you in this big cruel world, where things are measured and judged by how you look and what all you own and not with the acts of humility you do. Where crime, injustice and desctruction prevails which are saddening. I brought you for the utter selfish longing and craving to feel the warmth and have you in my arms. All the pains whatsoever in that process is nothing for the person you are. One who forgets and forgives and lives in the present. What a thing to learn from a one year old. The innocence, care, curiosity, faith, consistency in practice, focus, strength, your expression of happiness, love. You make me think of you every single moment. I never felt so loved and never thought of being capable of loving so much.

You are yourself so small picking up words and point to other kids even older than you saying "papa" (baby in tamil). Your love of reading. Pointing to a cow and saying "mmmmm" in that tone. Saying "ka ka" in your tone modulated like a crow is so very cute. Your body is still not capable of climbing down stairs and you trying to get down like an adult is scarily funny. You stopping everything and touching your cute-little-bum with that smile when asked about your tail. You talking something with the ants. You pointing up and saying "ange" (there) for any helicopter, aeroplane, jet noise irrespective of wherever you are. The best is, the way you say "amma". You just being aware of your surrounding makes my heart swell to the level of bursting out with pride. You asking for whatever you need to help others understand what you need is a milestone that you achieved way too early :). You asking for independence is a bittersweet feeling for me. That I am happy and proud for the fact that you are fast but sad that you are moving away from me every single moment in search of your own abode. I wish I could let go of your babydom as fast as you are growing up. I wish I could hold back time and see you like this always. But I know the best I can do is to capture the moments and seal everything in my heart. My child, I wish you don't need to pretend and just be yourself all your life. All I can do is to love you, always.

My existence is blessed because of your presence. Thanks my dear for just being you.

From,
Amma

New Year Resolutions

Oct 10
Me (Sad): I turn 30 today. I promised myself long back that I would be an extremely weight-conscious and healthy person after today.
S (My friend): Hmm.. Thats a very good thought.
Me: I think I will celebrate my birthday month and enjoy every food as much as possible.

Oct 31
Me (Sad): This month is also getting over.
S: Why not celebrating birthday year? Have a new year resolution and STICK to that.
Me: :D

Yes. I am facing withdrawal symptoms and am unable to control my temptations for good food. So listing out the BEST of what I like in Bangalore.

Shiv Sagar (Commercial Street)
Palak Dosa
Veg Makhanvala

EmGees (M G Road)
Babycorn Manchurian
Veg Patiala

Bombay Post (Old airport road)
Palak Chat
Kadai Paneer Patiala
Dal Makhani

Konark (Commercial Street)
Veg clear soup
Corn Palak
Masala Dosa

Indijoe
Breads (buffet lunch)

Cake Walk (Indiranagar)
Chocolate truffle (Eggless)

Calcutta Victoria Chat (Kasturinagar)
Puchke
Tikki Chat

Now that the year too is ending I hope I do everything to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. Things I have started doing in that direction:
Learning the steps to SuryaNamaskar.
Finish dinner by 7:30pm and nothing after that, except for a fruit incase I am hungry.
No alcohol.